Sky Full of Sorrow

I couldn't hide from the thunder in a sky full of song ...

Feeling like living in a loop. Saying, feeling the same things over and over again, feeling chained in a world in which I do not want to live anymore, feeling a foreigner, an alien, in my own shoes, in a world in which I cannot find myself, or hear myself, in all the noise that surrounds me.

I would like to stay on a top of a mountain, closing my eyes, hearing only my own heartbeats. I would like to be able to ignore the other voices that shaped me. Or be able to express myself freely in a world where everyone has something to say. Being able to open myself – really open and dare to say what I really think and feel (especially feel) – without being judged. This is what I miss the most.

I would like for one single day to unleash all my thoughts and feelings. Be a painter, or a god, and draw the sky of my own song. Be able to stop being the mother, the one who always helps, who always listens, who always protects, who always finds solutions, who is always there. I would like for one single day to stop caring and being the one who receives all that I give. I would like for one single day to stop caring all this heaviness on my shoulders.