"When we no longer know what to do, we have come to our real work and when we no longer know which way to go, we have begun our real journey".
(Wendell Berry)
I have always longed for stability and believed in the good in people. My design was pretty common and simple, the dreams of every human being, since the beginning of time, in a life where we run from loneliness. But somehow on this road something broke loose, and I started building wall after wall, moulding a sanctuary to hinder the pain that was inside.
We are never too old for pain, and we do lose control in front of strong, overwhelming feelings. Not all of us feel loved and worthy. Not all of us have a home to go to. Not all of us are surrounded by friends. And some of us have only us to cling to. Most of us are not seen, when the only thing that we need and want is the feeling of belongingness.
And like me, people have built up sanctuaries in places and with things that eased their pain. Some went to churches and dedicated their lives worshiping the unknown, others got lost in drugs, in sex, in alcohol, others in too much work, others searched for that holy meaning that we all search in their own children. All of us ran from pain into our own sanctuaries, chaining ourselves, not aware that our own sanctuaries are our own prisons where the only inhabitants are us, our loneliness, and that pain that we were actually running from.
Photo: https://naridarbandi.com/